Sunday, March 2, 2008

*@&#!#*%#@ (censored)

Tomorrow morning, I have an appointment to review Jaysen's records. I asked to view them in their entirety, but they have to truncate them if there are any other student's names due to confidentiality. Whatever. I can only imagine what they've pulled out.

I don't exactly know what it is that I'm looking for- Nothing? Everything? Regardless, I need to have a copy of them at this point. I'm making it a goal that I get copies a couple of times a year from now on.

Things have been pretty bad lately. At the last parent meeting (I think it was Tuesday of last week), the parents were even more irate than the prior one. I couldn't believe some of the comments and questions coming out of their mouths.

Imagine sitting there and hearing:

"Isn't there any way 'this student' could be moved to another school?"

"He needs to be in a class far away from any other kids."

"Isn't there a statue of limitations or something, that says how long he can be in with the general education?"

"Don't we have any say as to where this child should be placed?"

And my personal favorite...
"When is my child going to get the 'special attention' that this child is getting?"

I thought I was going to be sick.
I had to leave the meeting early to make it to work, and I was told the parents got even more aggressive after I left.

I contacted the room mom and asked her if the parents would benefit from a meeting with me. She thought they would, and said things have gotten pretty bad. She's confirmed that it's them against me. Although I offered the meeting, I have no idea what the fuck I'm supposed to say to these people. I can't believe they're so ignorant and mean-spirited.

The Special Education Coordinator called me Friday night to tell me technically I have not started the IEE process because I didn't mention a specific evaluation that I disagreed with. Nice. I love protocol. Let's buy some more time and leave Jaysen hanging. She also said she called because she had just heard how terrible the parents were at the meeting. She used an example that if we were Black, and they wanted Jaysen out of the school, it would not be tolerated. The fact that they want him out because he has a disability, shouldn't be tolerated either. In a nutshell, I told her to screw her IEE because that's the last of my issues right now. I need the parents and their attitudes addressed- NOW. I need the treatment of my son addressed- NOW. This has gotten way out of control. She agreed, and said that the parents will be confronted.

I told her I contacted the room mom to discuss setting up a meeting with me and the parents, to show them that I'm not just "sitting around 'reaping the benefits' of having a special needs child". She highly advised me that I not do it- and if I do, to have either her or the Director of Special Education present. Her concern is that if they were that awful with the principal and assistant superintendent at the meeting, she doesn't know what they're going to do if there is no authority figure there. I explained that I have gone through her, and the Director of Sp.Ed. It's done nothing thus far. I feel like I'm being backed into a corner, and this is the only option I have yet to try. I don't know...I'll have to do some thinking. If my advocate would ever call me back, I could see if she would come with me.

I can't believe that people are actually like this! These are people who are for the most part, upper-middle class (yeah, I'm way outta my element in this city), educated, and diverse. I cannot believe that they are acting so outrageous, closed-minded, and hostile toward a six year old!



Mary P Jones (MPJ) said...

Bleh! This whole situation keeps spinning and spinning out of control. It's terrible that the other parents keep pushing the top.

Casdok said...

My heart goes out to you, and unfortunatly i can believe it, and yes it is totally outrageous.
I think it would be a good idea to have the D of SE there, if the school could arrange it. But certainly somneone with some clout should be, just to see what you are up against.
Keep strong.

mommy~dearest said...

The issue is, these parents think I'm justifying and excusing his behavior. I want to show them that he is reacting to his environment. The very negative environment that the school has set up. That means all of the dirty laundry about how the school has been dragging their feet and have been negligent will have to come out. If I have the Director there, she's not going to like what I have to say or how I'm going to represent the school, and will intervene. I think it would be counter-productive.

mommy~dearest said...

You have to remember too, that the school (principal) doesn't want him there either, and is building a case to have him moved.

The silver lining is- this is actually still better than the school district we came from.

Marla said...

Like Casdok, I can believe it. The comments these parents said are disgusting. I am so sorry you are having to be in this situation and more so I am so sorry for your little one. Six years old and such struggles in school all ready. But, we have been there too. I just never stuck around like you did. I am proud of you for not backing down. Stay strong.

Anonymous said...

Hey, if you really want to read what some adults are thinking, go to this blogger: an educator! Read what words he uses to describe some children he is teaching. Unbelievable! Point is, when parents are aware of this, stand up, take issue, and yes, be STRONG.

Elissa - Managing Autism said...

I'm just in shock...
In fact I am totally appalled...

misha_k said...

This is so completely outrageous. The fact that these parents are acting this way is disgusting. The fact that the school is doing this to you and Jaysen is beyond reprehensible. Air all the dirty laundry if you have too. You don't deserve to be treated this way. Keep strong.