Thursday, September 20, 2007

Axe the Ex.

Ex came over last night to see Jaysen. It was his usual "once every couple of months" visit- which is a problem in itself.

This time, he called the night before saying he and Girlfriend will be by around 7:30-8:00p ish. 'Scuse me? I don't think so. I explained that it is a school night, and the importance of Jaysen's bedtime routine. I was booting him at 8:00. If that meant he showed up at 7:00, they'd have an hour with him. Show up at 7:45? sorry, but ya got 15 minutes.

I've become quite the hardass these past few weeks. It's really starting to bother me that Ex thinks it's cool for him to pop in and out of Jaysen's life when it's convenient for him. It bothers me that he has not once come up with any support, or help, in Jaysen's care. It bothers me that Ex can't come over without Girlfriend (who has the car), and Girlfriend calls the shots on where they're going (She wants Mexican food? Fine. Get it before you come over 'cuz my kid won't eat it. Oh, you're going there anyway 'cuz she really wants a vegetarian taco? Is this about Jaysen spending time with his father, or about your dietary needs? Kay- phear the wrath). And it really bugs me the most that Ex has not (nor wants to be) involved in any of the Autism aspect of his son. Yeah, he bucked up when another kid called Jaysen "weird", but he bucked up to an 8 year old. Nice. It's to the point where he doesn't even know how to interact with Jaysen. *end rant*

Anyway- they show up at 7:00 and whisk off to Burger King. 8:00 comes. 8:00 goes. Ex is probably thinking " can't boot me if I'm not there". I call his cell phone. He assures me he's just around the corner. They pull in at around 8:30 (that must've been a huge corner).

I inform Ex that he may now give Jaysen a shower, and prepare the child for bed.
"He doesn't want me in there" he says.
"Oh? Well get in there and make sure he bathes."
"But he told me to get out."
"Well, looks like you're going to have to figure something out, huh?"
Ex re-entered the bathroom only to turn right back out, followed by a sopping wet Jaysen.
"He says he's done."
(Good lord...)

Jaysen now is wound tighter than a drum, bouncing off of the walls. It's playtime at Chez Jaysen. I roll my eyes at Ex (who is still tickling Jaysen while telling him it's time for bed in the same breath) and try to get Jaysen settled. Epic fail. Ex and Girlfriend scram, leaving me with a hyper feral being, who only resembles my child physically.

Taking my own advice, I realize that resistance is futile...he watches a movie and goes to bed. At 11pm. Thank you Ex. Love ya. Idiot.


mcewen said...

Yup, this really is a horrible [and long] phase. I have no advice apart from lots of 'om' thoughts.
nip on over and pick up your award

Casdok said...

What is it with exes???!

Jodi said...

Well, that pretty much sucks.