Losing my religion

Or apparently is the concern of every mortal being I encounter lately.


Religion is like sales- which is why I generally avoid discussions centered around religious views, like the plague (no pun intended). Don't get me wrong- I actually like a good conversation about different religious views. I find it fascinating to hear people's different beliefs and customs. But there are also those people that once you get into a conversation, they will tell you the finer points of their religion, why they chose their path, and how your life would be so much better if you became a card-carrying member of their institiution as well.


Jenny McCarthy had the Mormons.


I have the Jehovas.


I absolutely mean no disrespect to any Jehova's Witnesses out there, but man- you people have endurance like the Energizer bunny!


Tonight is the third time I've been visited by this Jehova crew. Each time, the spokesperson for the group has been a young girl. When I say young, I'm talking no older than 12, and that's stretching it.


Why does she torment me so? Perhaps she is doing her godly duty? Okay, I can accept that. Or perhaps she knows she is cute, bordering on darling, and she knows that my motherly instincts cannot resist the forces of her cuteness- so I stand on the porch, listening to her tell me how Jehova is the way to go.


Tonight was no different, except Jaysen ran to the door to greet the unannounced visitor. He flings the door open to reveal the young girl, freckle-faced and smiling in her flowered dress, cross gleaming around her neck. He greets her with a "what again are you doing here"?


She opens her mouth to respond, but before she can get a word out, Jaysen quickly interrupts her with an "I fart".


Niiiice one, J.


I try to shove him inside the house, but he squirms past me since I have the door half open. Am I supposed to invite her in? I step outside- she tells me that she's stopped by several times, but hasn't been able to catch up with me. I think I now have a Jehova stalker.


So what do I do? Invite her back to chat on Saturday. Why? Because my life just needs a little more spice in it I guess. And by spice, I mean trying to figure out how to ditch this girl in all of her sweetness, and lie to her face about how I just got called for an emergency at a hospital I don't work at. Or something like that.


Why do I do this to myself?!?
I cannot deny the cute.