*@&#!#*%#@ (censored)

Tomorrow morning, I have an appointment to review Jaysen's records. I asked to view them in their entirety, but they have to truncate them if there are any other student's names due to confidentiality. Whatever. I can only imagine what they've pulled out.

I don't exactly know what it is that I'm looking for- Nothing? Everything? Regardless, I need to have a copy of them at this point. I'm making it a goal that I get copies a couple of times a year from now on.

Things have been pretty bad lately. At the last parent meeting (I think it was Tuesday of last week), the parents were even more irate than the prior one. I couldn't believe some of the comments and questions coming out of their mouths.

Imagine sitting there and hearing:

"Isn't there any way 'this student' could be moved to another school?"

"He needs to be in a class far away from any other kids."

"Isn't there a statue of limitations or something, that says how long he can be in with the general education?"

"Don't we have any say as to where this child should be placed?"

And my personal favorite...
"When is my child going to get the 'special attention' that this child is getting?"


I thought I was going to be sick.
I had to leave the meeting early to make it to work, and I was told the parents got even more aggressive after I left.

I contacted the room mom and asked her if the parents would benefit from a meeting with me. She thought they would, and said things have gotten pretty bad. She's confirmed that it's them against me. Although I offered the meeting, I have no idea what the fuck I'm supposed to say to these people. I can't believe they're so ignorant and mean-spirited.

The Special Education Coordinator called me Friday night to tell me technically I have not started the IEE process because I didn't mention a specific evaluation that I disagreed with. Nice. I love protocol. Let's buy some more time and leave Jaysen hanging. She also said she called because she had just heard how terrible the parents were at the meeting. She used an example that if we were Black, and they wanted Jaysen out of the school, it would not be tolerated. The fact that they want him out because he has a disability, shouldn't be tolerated either. In a nutshell, I told her to screw her IEE because that's the last of my issues right now. I need the parents and their attitudes addressed- NOW. I need the treatment of my son addressed- NOW. This has gotten way out of control. She agreed, and said that the parents will be confronted.

I told her I contacted the room mom to discuss setting up a meeting with me and the parents, to show them that I'm not just "sitting around 'reaping the benefits' of having a special needs child". She highly advised me that I not do it- and if I do, to have either her or the Director of Special Education present. Her concern is that if they were that awful with the principal and assistant superintendent at the meeting, she doesn't know what they're going to do if there is no authority figure there. I explained that I have gone through her, and the Director of Sp.Ed. It's done nothing thus far. I feel like I'm being backed into a corner, and this is the only option I have yet to try. I don't know...I'll have to do some thinking. If my advocate would ever call me back, I could see if she would come with me.

I can't believe that people are actually like this! These are people who are for the most part, upper-middle class (yeah, I'm way outta my element in this city), educated, and diverse. I cannot believe that they are acting so outrageous, closed-minded, and hostile toward a six year old!

Dammit.

My birthday rocks?

Jaysen's been so excited for my birthday this year...


This morning's conversation:

"Jaysen, do you know what today is?"

"What?"

"It's the 22nd"

"It's your birthday!"

"Yep it is!"

"You go to work."

"Yes, I have to go to work."

"Yes. You go to work and you have fun. You play with rocks and play hide-and-seek."

"Ummm...okay."

A bit of news.

I just received a phone call from the compliance Officer of the ISD. She wanted some details of the issues surrounding Jaysen at school, and we set up an appointment to discuss them for this Friday.

Which, by the way, also happens to be my birthday...

Anyway, the Compliance Officer noted that I have some complaints (legitimate legal and procedural violations), and some concerns (Jaysen's treatment and environment). She wanted to make me aware that we would be discussing the actual complaints. I told her I was aware of that, and I included the concerns for more of a background.

Hopefully, this is the first real step to get things going.

My father was talking to a teacher in another school district- apparently, although our district has a phenominal school system, they're notorious for having craptastic special education services. Getting services from our district is like getting Ex to pay child support. And trust me, there's a better chance of me becoming a nun.

That said, I guess I've been doing pretty well considering Jaysen does have services, they're just the wrong ones. Hey- at least if they're there, they can be tweaked until they're correct.

This teacher-lady also told my dad of the surrounding districts that are worth a shit. I at least have a starting point to researching a more supportive environment for Jaysen.

All that aside, I've been having issues with Blogger (at least I think it's Blogger). For some reason, I have been unable to post comments on other blogs. Sometimes it will work, but for the most part, the comments keep getting bounced back to me. I am computer illiterate, so this is driving me batshit crazy, as I do not know what the problem is.

*smooches*

Ho hum.

I have nothing new to report...just waiting.
Waiting, waiting, waiting...

While I'm waiting, here's some pics of the boys!



Capt'n Jaysen driving a boat this past summer:



Are you quite done playing with your toy now? I'd like to play with it too.



Jaysen on Aunt Sissy's horse, Dilly:



Whoo hoo! It's my first birfday and what is this thing in front of me?!?



Rylan showing his sweet side:



This box is the coolest thing ever!



Hmmm...we're taking Chuckie in for a paternity test.



My aspiring swimsuit model:



How the heck does this thing work?



Because every good mom has taught their kids how to protect themselves in the event of a Zombie invasion:


Hey- you really never know.

Liar, liar, pants on fire.

Mr.Sub has brought some highs and lows to Jaysen's programming at school. On one hand, he's been pretty fantastical with Jaysen- he understands that Jaysen does things that a typical kid may not do, doesn't take Jaysen's behavior personally, has been able to pick up on when he is overloaded, sees the potential that Jaysen has, and is trying to get to know him.

On the other hand, Mr.Sub is still a gen.ed teacher. He realizes that when Jaysen does perform, he usually outperforms the whole class. He has to find things for him to do, just to keep him busy because Jaysen is working circles around the rest of the class when he does work. Since he is a gen.ed teacher, he has literally been thrown into a classroom without any instruction. He had no idea that a sensory area had been constructed for Jaysen to use, he has no idea where Jaysen's extra clothing is (if Jaysen's pants get snowy at recess, he has to change them), he has no idea how to fill out the daily communication sheets or ABC charts when an incident does happen. An example is, he mentioned to me that "even when Jaysen earns 'all 5 stickers', we don't always have time to use the computer." I told him nicely that he had to make the time because this is part of Jaysen's behavior plan. It's imperative to follow through, especially on the reward part.

But like I said, he's not malicious- he just really doesn't know, because nobody "bothered" to tell him. He's also "figuring it all out" on his own, and he's not happy. He's figured out that the role they want him to play is to get Jaysen out of the school. He has seen how they treat him, and has seen their lack of focus, and he's not happy. But therein lies the problem- does one take advocating for their student over their job? His sp.ed teacher did just that, and look where it landed her.

I submitted a complaint letter to the Special Ed. department, stating my dissatisfaction with how this school year has been handled thus far, and put in a request that Mr.Sub attend training for Autism. When I spoke with him, he told me that he's been reading up on as much as he could find, and he feels that training would benefit him as well. I also asked that he be given the lead role in Jaysen's education for the rest of the year. If his teacher has not treated him fairly by now, I can't see that things would change. I also added that I wished to schedule a time to discuss moving Jaysen to a more supportive environment for next year.

Putting two and two together- Jaysen's sp.ed teacher will not be returning to school. Ever. So now, my sp.ed son is left without a sp.ed teacher. Isn't that conducive to an "appropriate education"? That's what I thought too. The principal has flat out lied to me regarding her whereabouts, and there's nothing I despise more than a liar. I can't see returning my son to a school that is led by a liar, in a school which is supposed to be serving my child, but has left him in the dust.

Where would I send him? I have no idea just yet. I have to research schools, but how do I know the same crap won't happen again in the upcoming year? Jaysen did beautifully last year with a supportive principal leading the school. This new principal doesn't know her ass from a hole on the wall. I just can't believe the other parents are believing the loads of crap spewing from her mouth. She's very good at being convincing...and conniving.

There was a meeting with the classroom parents before school on Friday. At the meeting, the parents brought up their concern that disability awareness wasn't done early enough. The school should have made an effort to educate the class about disabilities early in the year. The principal said that she looked into a "Disability Bus" that comes around to present an assembly for schools regarding what it's like to have a disability. You have to wait your turn though, it's not something you can just order. She also said that a presentation to the class was not done at the beginning of the year because I had not consented to it.

I couldn't keep quiet any longer. I raised my hand, and explained that if she wanted to be proactive, there are things you can order. There are books, presentations, games, etc. regarding disabilities, online, that all you have to do is click on the button to order them. I then turned to the parents and told them that I did offer to come in and inservice about Autism back in November. There was a low grumble amongst the parents, and they questioned the principal why I was never taken up on the offer. Not surprisingly, she "couldn't remember that conversation", so I said I would forward her the e-mail from back in November (which I did).

I've had it. I've had it with a principal that can't take any accountability, and tries to pawn off her procrastination on everyone else. I'm not taking this anymore. I'm considering calling a meeting with any parents that are interested, to show them just what it is that I've been going through to get acceptable services for Jaysen. This is not my issue, and I'm not going to let my son suffer because the parents have been led to believe the school is sterling and I'm the one who's lacking.

I'm not the type of person who welcomes everyone and their momma into our business, but this is affecting how these parent's kids are interacting with mine. If I have to put our dirty laundry out there, I will. Maybe they will see the negligence of the school and help me stop this mistreatment.

The saga continues...

Self inflicted gag-order

Oh... I want to post...I want to post...but I can't.
Not yet.
Although I feel as I need to get some of this crap off of my chest- I don't want anyone to get in trouble on my account. Craaaaap.

Hopefully, in a few days I'll be able to.

Just know that the fight is not over, in fact, it's getting quite intense.
Hang in there...


Meanwhile, please read this moving post by Ashley's Mom at Pipecleaner Dreams.

And this interesting one by Casdok at Mother of Shrek.

And this mind blowing one by Elissa at Managing Autism.

And this funny one at My Quirky Boy.

And this chaotic one by Maddy at Whitterer on Autism.

And this one for some lovely summery pictures by Jodi at Reimer Reason.


Okay- that said, I have to clock out now and go home. Dinner and two cranky kids await me.

Some friday humor for ya.

Just came across these and they made me laugh- credit to Lori Miller Fox.



Your School District Might Be a Pain In The Neck If...


they think No Child Left Behind means taking a final head count on a field trip.

your child’s one-to-one can’t add one to one.

the Special Ed Director thinks hippotherapy means riding on the back of a hippo.

they think AAC is what keeps you cool in the summer.

there are notches on the school district’s side of the conference table.

the school’s special education attorney has a permanent office in the district office building.

the school nurse sends your child home because the teacher has a headache.

the superintendent can’t come to your child’s IEP because of the restraining order.

they pat you down before the IEP meeting.

the school district’s brand new conference room chairs already need to have the cushions replaced.

they consider an inclusive placement standing between two regular ed kids in the lunch line.

they consider outdoor recess a least restrictive environment.

your child’s inclusive classroom has only one chair in it.

when you go to an IEP meeting, the Special Education Director gives you decaf and tells you it’s caffeinated just to get you off your game.

your school’s idea of a behavioral intervention plan exclusively consists of hand clapping and a sugar cookie.

you have your special education attorney’s phone number on speed dial.


*Enjoy!*