Decisions.

Head spinning....make it stop....

I have to make a decision.
I have to make a decision, and come to some terms I don't know that I'm ready to come to terms with just yet.

It's looking like next year, Jaysen will be moving into the self-contained, EI (emotionally impaired) classroom.

Ugh.
Okay, that wasn't too bad...

Here's what's going on.
The Autism Consultant explained it that Jaysen's educational predicament is unique because he has one foot in each program. He doesn't fit in total SpEd, but doesn't fit in GenEd either. Currently, Jaysen is struggling with mainstreaming. His behavior is impeding his classroom time, and that in turn is impeding his learning time.

Bottom line is despite everyone saying he is academically capable, Jaysen is having difficulty in the large, fast-paced, GenEd setting.  We can say he's not getting the right supports, but honestly, he's in 6th grade. How long am I going to fight for different supports, only to have yet another year wasted away? He works really well in small group or 1:1. He does awesome, in fact. He learns best when the instructions or assignment can be "chunked" and presented in a different way. GenEd isn't structured to do that.

The self-contained class I visited at the middle school was pretty promising. I really liked the teacher, and he seemed to be focused on the student's education. The teacher, being EI certified, is used to dealing with explosive behaviors, and won't necessarily take them personally, but might be able to help Jaysen work through and process them.

What sealed the deal for me though, was the promise that even in the self-contained classroom, Jaysen will still progress forward in the GenEd curriculum, and maintain on a diploma-bound track.
This is HUGELY important to me/us right now.
Jaysen wants to go to college. He wants to be a kindergarten teacher.
In reality- do I know that he will or won't go to college? No, nobody knows that at this point. He's in 6th grade. But my point to the Team was, in 6th grade, it's far too early to close that door for good. They agreed, and assured me he would, at this point, remain diploma-bound.

In a nutshell:
(negatives)
Jaysen will not be mainstreamed. He will be removed from GenEd and placed in SpEd full time.
He would have little to no contact with the GenEd population.
He would be in in a classroom with kids that generally have moderate-severe behavior problems (red flag to possible increase Jaysen's aggression)
If he and the teacher don't "click", too bad, it's the only teacher he'll have for the next 2 years.

(positives)
Super small class size. This year, there are 2 students.
He will remain on diploma-bound grade level curriculum.
The teacher would be able to present information in different ways, so Jaysen better understands what's expected.
He could work at his own pace, and teaching would be more individualized (Y'know, like the I in IEP?).

When I discussed this with Jaysen, he seemed apprehensive about going to a new school at first. I asked him his thoughts about the bigger GenEd classroom this year, vs the smaller Resource Room, where he had basically been all year last year as his main room. He did say he liked the smaller RR better.

I'm a stressed out fracking mess, because once the motion is accepted, I am basically signing off on him saying "General Education does not work for my son".
And I am coming to terms that, y'know, it just doesn't. And that's okay.
It is okay, right?
Yes, it is okay.

Send booze.
Okay?

B-day!

Happy 6th Birthday Ry!

 

You are amazing, and we love you so very much!

Happy birthday to my baby.

~xoxoxoxo~

P.S. You are still a dork.

 

Got math?

I'm sensing a theme here.
You all know my math skills suck.  I could try to sugar coat it, but really...they just suck.
And I'm okay with that, because I am able to conjugate verbs, spell, and grammarize (yes, grammarize) circles around most people. That being said...

I work for the CFO of my company.
He's actually pretty awesome, but he's a "numbers" guy. I swear there are times we have full conversations and neither one of us understands the other.
He also likes to tease me about my lack of mathematical skill, and purposely asks me questions he knows I don't know the answer to because he finds some kind of sadistic joy in it, I imagine.

Anyway....
In helping Jaysen in his math homework last night, I realize yet again, that my kid rocks.

Example: Jaysen is working on converting fractions, to decimals, to percentages.

 He explains how he has to divide 70 by 100 to get the decimal.

 

And then...

 

 

 

 Me: Awesome job! Now how did you make the decimal a percent?

Jaysen: I butthundred it.

Me: You...what?
Jaysen: I butt-hundred it.
Me: Butt-hundred it?
Jaysen: Yes, you have to butt-hundred it!
Me: Hahahaha! What in the world is butt-hundred?
Jaysen: Look...

 



And there you go.
My boss will be so proud of me.

Ketchup

Okay, so I've been busy losing my mind and need to update.

First off- THANK YOU to those who commented on my previous post. Your advice is absolutely invaluable and I love you guys.



Me loving you guys

Secondly- I still have readers! *happiez*

I digress. Back to the Outcome.
I was able to hold the Team off on modifying anything just yet. I asked for every possible evaluation I could think of. OT, Speech, academic, and technological.  Jaysen's IEP is in December, and I'd like these evals done prior to that, but it is the district, and I'm not holding my breath. This is a big IEP though since it's his re-qualifying one, and also will be dealing with his transition to middle school next year. I do plan on calling a transition meeting in a few months, and I ain't skeered to re-open the IEP if need be.

Regarding some of the frustration Jaysen has been experiencing this year- we did, as a Team, decide to withdraw Jaysen from band. Although I was initially against the idea, it causes Jaysen major stress. If we try it without band, it just could relieve some of the avoidance behaviors he's been exhibiting, but we won't know until we try. On the up side, they replaced band with art, something Jaysen enjoys immensely. So the up side is that he now has art everyday.

I'm also laying down the law (again) with my minion.  We are going to read every single night and try to boost his reading skills. Jaysen hates reading because he finds it difficult. We're back to limiting the video games to an hour after school. Jaysen actually gets more than this because he's home before I am, but I'm not going to create a situation that will foster lying to me, so I'm just looking at it as a freebie for him. So far, it's been met with some resistance, but I expect that.

And that's really all I know.

On a side note- 6th grade is friggin' tough! I can't believe the amount of homework that comes home every night. It's insane. And frustrating for everyone, not just Jaysen. My math skills topped out in 4th grade. Sad, but pretty true. I can spell the feck out of anything (a-n-y-t-h-i-n-g. See?), but when it comes to finding common denominators....look for them yo' damn self, 'cuz I can't find squat.  You need to get 6 cups of sugar into 4 bowls? Eyeball it.  You need 10 apples to go into 8 lunches? I guess 2 people need to eat oranges. That's life, people. Suck it up.
(Thank you Sissy, for helping me with Jaysen's math homework!)

There's the update.
Send a math tutor.

Accommodation vs. Modification

Well, it's happened.  The Team is talking about modifying Jaysen's curriculum.
Shit.
I mean, if it's what he needs, of course I am all for it and will support it fully.
But how do we know he needs it?
This is his first year being mainstreamed, due to technicalities of the district...
Their response to me was that he bombed his econ test. Okay...well he's also aced some other tests, so....?

I have a meeting next week to discuss it. We're also doing a REED and Hopes and Dreams? The REED (Review of Existing Educational Data) is to determine what evals we would need in his 3rd year re-eval coming in December, based on class reports and standardized tests. Mkay. The Hopes and Dreams?  Sounds like a load of fluffy bullshit to me. Let me guess- we're all going to sit around in a kumbaya circle and talk about where we want to see Jaysen a year from now, then 3 years, 5 years, blah blah blah. Oh gawd, make it stop.....

Back to the issue at hand...
I'm pissed off that they just want to modify.
I don't think they've exhausted their efforts beyond a moderate attempt, and even then, it's been more of a "let's see what's on our bag of tricks" approach.

Yes, Jaysen has accommodations.
He has a parapro. He has extended time. He is allowed the option of working in a quieter environment. He is allowed breaks.

So what's the problem?
I'm not convinced that he knows how to use these "resources".
I'm not convinced that he is able to identify when he needs these "resources".
He knows he should take a break when he's upset, but does he know when he needs the break?

Jaysen has self-regulation issues. He misses the "cues" that tell us we are getting worked up, and can seemingly go from 0-60 in no time. Is a break effective, if he's already a 8 on a 1-10 scale?

The real problem???
Jaysen is one of those kids who is all over the board when you talk about function. He's smart, and he's verbal. That combination is usually assumed to be "high functioning", based on presentation. However, his verbal abilities are way above his cognitive ones. You can ask him a question, and he will answer it like he is "supposed to". Ask him to expand, or the same question phrased more open-ended? Omg, are we even having the same conversation?  I tried studying with him for a test, the night before he knew NOTHING. He ended up acing the test. ACING it.

The problem is that Jaysen is so "internalized" (I just made that up), meaning that he perseverates, a lot. So much in fact, that I believe that's his main deficit. His perseveration leads to heightened anxiety, not knowing how to deal with that anxiety leads to heightened frustration, frustration leads to refusal, non-compliance, outbursts, or kaboom.  He doesn't show outward measurable signs, so FBA's have been ineffective. They can't track what they can't see, and there are no patterns to pick up on.  So to them, it looks like "totally random behavior".

Well we all know better than that. Nothing is "totally random". Something is happening, we just aren't able to identify it consistently. But it's not "random".

I'm all over the effing place on this post, no?

Anyway, because they can't identify patterns in Jaysen's behavior, they want to modify his curriculum because he's still getting frustrated and upset. They think a reducing expectations will help that.

I think that's kind of nuts.

You're telling me you can't identify what's upsetting Jaysen, so you are going to assume it's the expectations placed on him.  You are also going to assume that reducing these expectations is going to decrease his frustration and raise his willingness to participate in school.
Let me ask you this.
I suck at math. Seriously, that's even exaggerating for me. I am embarrassed at how horrible my math skills are, and I should have been paying more attention in 3rd grade instead of stuffing my bra in the bathroom. But back to the topic....

If you put 20 algebra problems in front of me, and see that I am struggling with them, what can you do?
1- You can reduce the number of problems from 20 to 10.
     This is great, if I even knew how to solve for "x" on even ONE problem, but I don't.
2-You can give me more time.
     Another great one. I have even more time I have to spend in algebra hell...
3- You can give me a calculator.
     Great. That whole "watch I can make it say hell and boobs" joke never gets old.
4- You can break it down and explain it to me in steps.
     Now this may work...I have bigger boobs now and don't need to stuff my bra.
5- You can give me basic math facts instead of algebra.
     This is a great option if I don't have a strong grasp on basic math and need to back up.

My point is, if you can't identify the problem, how do you know what the solution is? I think they are wanting to jump into "modification" (option 5), before 1-4 are exhausted. Moving from Accommodated to Modified curriculum is a huge deal. It means my son will never graduate with a diploma. It has the potential to affect his life negatively.  He will not have the opportunity to attend college. He wants to go to college. He wants to be a teacher. Even if college isn't in the cards, I at least want him to have that option.  Options are important, people.
I'm not comfortable that they've shown me he is unable to achieve the minimum required outcomes in the general setting with accommodations. What are those accommodations? That's where identifying the problem comes in.

I'm rambling again.
Because I'm frustrated.
Because Jaysen is *rightfuckingthere* on the fence.

I've asked for the Autism specialist to come in and observe.  The Autism consultant is the douchebag from the "shitty school" who had no freaking idea anything about Autism in real life with real kids.  But that's where I have to start.

I need help peeps.
I need your opinions, advice, experiences, stories, etc.
I need to know if it's better to not modify but maybe put in a more restrictive environment like up his sp.ed time and increase Resource? Or is it better to modify and keep in gen.ed?

I hate this.

I Blinked...

....and somebody turned 11.

Happy Birthday, Bear!

I love you.



High 5

I know.
I have some updating to do about school and such, but I just came across this on a blog Love That Max. (You should click that link too, because omg, this mom is way smart, and Max is just adorable. Trust me, just go for the cute factor. You'll keep going back for the content.)

But check this out!
Apparently, there's a company, Vision Service Plan (VSP) that just launched a Send A High Five campaign to donate up to 50,000 gift certificates to Special Olympic athletes for a free eye exam, new glasses, and follow up eye care. And all you have to do is click a high five. Seriously, that's it.

It's super important. And? It's super fun.  There's different high fives you can choose, and you can send a bazillion if you want.
I would know, because that's all I've done this morning at work so far.

So get on it, here's the link.
Start high fiving!

Vision Service Plan's

Send a High Five