Friday, June 11, 2010

SIBs suck.

Some of you will immediately recognize the following.
Others, I hope will understand why sometimes the circles under my eyes are so dark, or why I may seem preoccupied...

What would you do...... if you noticed marks on your child's body like this?



Or this?.........



Now.....what if the marks were self-inflicted?

No matter how seasoned I become as a parent, SIBs (Self Injurious Behaviors) are still one of the most heart-wrenching things for me to witness. This is not the first time for us, nor is it the last, but it never gets easier no matter how many times you bear witness to your child self harming.

Jaysen's frustration and anxiety, coupled with his inability to self-regulate, create an emotional abattoir to which the only acceptable release is to launch into a physical attack on himself. Usually the incidents are short-lived, but with repeated blows, he carries the bruises for days, if not weeks.

My heart carries the trauma much longer.
The part that tears me apart is, I am utterly helpless. I can't help him. I can't stop him. I can't make it better, or take the pain away. I can only try to keep him safe at the time. Try to make sure there is as minimal damage inflicted as possible.

Because I know I am not alone in dealing with this...
Extra love to you all dealing with the same.

8 comments:

Bobbi said...

Oh, that looks so awful. Poor poor guy! I can't believe he does that to himself. That is so sad. That looks so painful. I hope he grows out of it or learns not to do it. Hugs to you.

Marshella said...

Hugs... and lots of good thoughts coming your way.

Niksmom said...

*reaching to hold your hand* As a mom who's been there, too, I feel your pain and I understand the heartache. Sending you love and strength.

Piscesgirl said...

Big hugs for you... We are only experienceing these problems from time to time. sisnce he is only 3 there is no telling if it wil get better, or worse. We hope Jaysen grows out of it as he gets older, and send lots of love your way. :)

mommy~dearest said...

Thank you, everyone...
Niksmom- I was channeling your support, glad you got the message. :)

Tanya @ TeenAutism said...

It is so heart-wrenching. Sending big hugs and much empathy.

Ashley's Mom said...

Although the incidents are few and far between now, I, too, have been there with my sweet Ashley. She will forever have scars on her wrists and hands from biting herself.

All I know is that in her case, increased ability to communicate via sign language helped. Well that, and getting rid of a wicked teacher she had during the worst of the SIBs.

Joeymom said...

Lots of hugs for you and your little guy. Joey bites himself when beyond his limit (like the picnic yesterday... and when I tried to intervene, he bit ME. Poor little guy!)

Sending lots and lots of hugs. And more.