Dear Supreme Being,
Usually, I am a firm believer in two things.
1) Everything happens for a reason, and 2) What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.
Is killin' me.
I'm starting to think my fortitude is being tested, and I'm writing a formal notice that you can stop now. My limit has been reached, if not surpassed.
The house fire? Maybe I needed to start anew, with a quite literal, clean slate.
King Attitude and The Red One? The ones I affectionately call my children? Let's just say it's a good thing you made 'em so cute, because I've halted trying to barter with Gypsies on their trade. At least for the time being.
This??? This borders on just cruel.
Seriously. The only time I've ever heard of "parvo" is from dogs being sick.
You gave me a dog virus?
Maybe my lesson is I needed to know that humans can get the parvovirus too. I dunno.
What I do know is, that it sucks.
Who the heck created a virus that presents as rheumatoid arthritis?
They are pure evil.
My joints are a swollen knotty mess, and the pain. My gawd, the pain!
It's literally almost unbearable. And by unbearable, I mean I've considered going Evil Dead style and contemplated lopping off body parts with a chainsaw, just to get some relief.
And this can continue for "several weeks" to "several months"?
Thank you, but I'm done.
I've had enough.
You may stop testing me, and give me back my "normal" life.
Now's good for me.