Just came across these and they made me laugh- credit to Lori Miller Fox.
Your School District Might Be a Pain In The Neck If...
they think No Child Left Behind means taking a final head count on a field trip.
your child’s one-to-one can’t add one to one.
the Special Ed Director thinks hippotherapy means riding on the back of a hippo.
they think AAC is what keeps you cool in the summer.
there are notches on the school district’s side of the conference table.
the school’s special education attorney has a permanent office in the district office building.
the school nurse sends your child home because the teacher has a headache.
the superintendent can’t come to your child’s IEP because of the restraining order.
they pat you down before the IEP meeting.
the school district’s brand new conference room chairs already need to have the cushions replaced.
they consider an inclusive placement standing between two regular ed kids in the lunch line.
they consider outdoor recess a least restrictive environment.
your child’s inclusive classroom has only one chair in it.
when you go to an IEP meeting, the Special Education Director gives you decaf and tells you it’s caffeinated just to get you off your game.
your school’s idea of a behavioral intervention plan exclusively consists of hand clapping and a sugar cookie.
you have your special education attorney’s phone number on speed dial.